Falling in love all over again

I remember my first night with my very first ipod. I was COMPLETELY head over heels with that little 30 gig rectangle. The sound of the click wheel–ohh my little heart went pitter pat. I like a LOT of different music, and Tony and I had a wide array of discs to load. I was impatient, though, that first night, so I only loaded about 20 or so albums to start, and then I could wait no longer. I headed out to the back yard with a beer (yes, and a cigarette-that’s how I rolled back then), popped on some headphones and hit shuffle. Axl Rose followed by Garth Brooks. I was in HEAVEN!!!
Flash forward 7 or 8 years, and I get my iPhone. Felt like Helen and George movin’ into that dee-luxe apartment in the sky. Yeah, I was movin’ on up. Then my external hard drive died. 500GB of pictures and music–takes the wind out of me even now to think about that moment of realization. Poor me–so, so sad.
Then, a week or so later, I am getting something out of the closet, and I spy a silver corner sticking off the edge of a shelf. What is that? Oh my gosh, it’s my old ipod. Not the original bad boy, but my first upgrade–a 60G model that was over TWO-THIRDS full. Can you hear the angels singin’???I spent a month or so walking around with both the phone and the pod, but I knew I was going to need to try and make the leap soon, and sync the pod so I could get these tunes onto my lovely phone.
So last week, I found a program that for $20 would take the files from my lil old ipod and get ‘em set up on my computer. It worked. HUGE sigh of relief. Last night I made a new playlist to live on my phone. It has 533 of my favorite songs.
I have been in a music induced state of bliss all day long. Heard Tom Petty, Brad Paisley, Led Zeppelin, Willie Nelson, Michael Jackson, Bruce Springsteen, Rage Against the Machine, Taylor Swift, Jay-Z, James Taylor, Patsy Cline, Metallica, and yes, even a little GNR and Garth. I am remembering the feeling of amazement and fascination that came when I first realized how ingenious and wonderful this little rectangle was. It is the ultimate mix tape.
Clickety, clickety, click, click, click.

Be still my heart…..

What I’m lovin’ right now

1. Lovin’ a crockpot full of yummy chili

2. Lovin’ Jessie’s full on happy laugh

3. Lovin’ that I have proof that all three of my kids actually CAN follow simple directions on occasion

4. Lovin’ that it’s cooling down to an awesome temp outside right now.

5. Lovin’ these three terrific kids.

6. Lovin that these two do have sweet moments once in a while.

 

 

 

 

Kurt and Evey

I am not best friends with Kurt or Evey. They have many, many life friends that are spectacularly close to them. It’s amazing really, the kind of friends they have. But I am friends enough that I care very much for them, and have had reason to follow the events in their lives over the past 3 years very closely.

I remember the first time I saw Kurt Thallmayer. It was in a Sr. Staff meeting at our company 10 years or so ago. He got introduced as a fairly new member of our company and was there to do a presentation of some kind. At the time, our company was still a very corporate environment–men wore shirts and ties, women wore heels and hose. Suits were commonplace. So up to the front walks this kid with surfer hair, lookin’ straight out of Huntington Beach High School. He must have been in a suit, but I just rememer thinking, “Who IS this kid? He must be something, though, to be speaking in this environment, with accompanying high praise on his work from our management. Fast forward quite a few years later, and indeed I find that the surfer hair kid has cut his hair and moved his way up in the company. Tony even works for him for a time. Meanwhile, another woman I work with is assigned to a project with me and a few others. Through the course of the project, we all become friends and though several of us are married and have kids, Evey is not one of them. I always thought she was such a great and fun girl, I wished she could find someone to love. Fast forward again, a year or so later, and Tony comes home one day and tells me that Kurt and Evey are dating.
Click.
Game, set, perfect match.
A walk off home run to win the pennant.
A 62 on the last day of the Masters.
Game 7, Michael Jordan with the ball for the last second shot.
All of it, you know. From that moment, I thought, wow, God’s at work there. They will have a great marriage and a great life together.
I had just had Josh when I heard that Kurt was diagnosed with Leukemia. We followed his recovery process closely. Waiting for updates on his blog with good news about his fight. I prayed daily for his full recovery. When he went into remission, and got engaged to Evey, I immediately offered to do the slideshow for her wedding if she would let me. She said yes.
Shortly before the wedding Evey let me know that Kurt had come out of remission. The wedding would need to be postponed.
As it turns out, they married anyway. On this day one year ago, they became the husband and wife they were meant to be. Bless their hearts and souls, they are so in love. Even now, across this life to the next. Rest in peace Kurt, and live in peace Evey. You will be together again someday.

Here is the link to our wedding/anniversary gift for you two: http://vimeo.com/23722610

Starting the New Year right

I think that because Jessica’s birthday is on the 1st, we always start the year off in a great way–celebrating and sharing with our family. Hangin’ out together. It’s limiting on the aftershocks from the night before as well (at least until she’s MUCH older). The first day of the year for us is always lived in the now.

Today, the real New Year begins for us, and I am looking forward to it. We have had a very tough couple of years. The health of some of our friends and family has not been the best, and their struggles continue. And it seems like the shocks keep coming and there is no time to absorb and adjust to them, before a new reality is serving as an overlay on our lives. So this year, I am looking forward to the changes, and the learning, and the growing. I don’t want to wait to absorb, and let pain sink in and discolor the palette of the joyful and inspirational moments that happen for us daily. I want to bounce off the bumpers like a pinball, and welcome the new directions in which they lead us. I want to see the world through each new overlay in the fresh way that only experience can bring. I am hopeful that this desire will remain at the forfront of my spirit through the year. We are never without bumps and bruises, and sometimes we seem to also have a tough time keeping away from the breaks and cuts as well, but I want this desire and expectancy to override the pain I know must come, and give us a year to mark as the one where we began to rise above. A year that saw us spend many, many days as we did that very first one of 2011. Here’s to it…

It’s Just Not the Same

I LOVE Back to School season. It means that the heat of summer has an end in sight. That my kids get to see their classmates again. That football season is starting soon. And that fresh school supplies will be shopped for. And that’s where it falls apart for me a little bit.

When I was a kid, my mom would take me out, and I’d get a new 3″ three ring binder (Cardinal was the preferred brand), new subject separators, a couple freshly sharpened pencils, and clear Bic blue and black pens. And best of all, a 300 sheet pack of college ruled notebook paper. I loved arranging my notebook just so–some paper in between each tab. The pens and pencils safely tucked in the frosted plastic zipped pouch that would inevitably lose its ability to zip well before Christmas break. I flippin’ LOVED the feeling of that clean, well organized, plastic smelling, 9×12 (x3 1/2″ with all the paper), piece of childhood.

See, here in SoCal nowadays, that’s not how kids do the back to school thing. Oh yes, as a parent I still need to buy those things listed above, but also color coded folders (no prongs, please), 5 glue sticks, reams of copy paper, colored pencils, crayons, scissors, fine black sharpies, extra fine black sharpies, expo markers (low odor), dry erase boards, and a clear covered white 1 1/2′ inch binder that would never fit 300 college or wide ruled pieces of paper, even if they were allowed to put the paper in the notebooks. And that’s the thing that bugs me most–they can’t organize ANY of it. Everyone shows up at school day 1 with a 30lb. backpack filled with these packaged/half-packaged goods, to be used by the teachers, them and their classmates for the remainder of the year. Don’t get me wrong I LOVE my kids’ school. It is wonderful, and the teachers are mostly the most fantastic people ever, but the school supply thing? It’s NOT.THE.SAME.

So while I’m out hunting for the 12 pack of washable markers (thin, not thick, and 12, not 10, as sold at nearly EVERY office supply store around), I may sneak a nice colored 3″ binder in my cart, and don’t be surprised if a 300 pack of paper makes it in the cart as well.

What did you do today?

Had an approved day off from work today (no slick fakery like Ferris had), and spent it with these guys:

We saw the creation of artistic masterpieces

Saw a concert by a hot new group

Attended a sporting event

Indulged in fresh baked goodies

Witnessed random acts of kindness toward those unable to do for themselves

Continued building a foundation of love and friendship that will last a lifetime

I think even Cameron Frye would have known he’d seen something good today. Thank goodness we didn’t go anywhere. We would have missed all of this….

Just the Boys. It’s wasome!!!

Josh and Tony have been best, best buds during Tony’s last couple days off. So cute together. I know Tony just loves to be this kind of Dad to his boy. I love watching it….

I Wanna Be Famous

Have you heard this song? It’s by yet another band (brand) marketed to my little tweens. I already struggle with managing their exposure to the massive marketing machine that is coming at them in every piece of their lives vs. the real stuff, the good stuff, that is soooo hard to come by because of our busy lives. The good stuff is not manufactured. It takes hard work, and there is no guarantee that that work results in any kind of short term, fun payoff–in fact most of the time, it doesn’t. And it’s not that the marketing machine is all bad either. Disneyland really has come awfully close on more than one occassion to being the real live happiest place on Earth for our family. But this song really kills me. Here’s the last verse of the song:

Your song is on the radio.
high rotation video.
Bright lights, fan mail.
Paparazzi on your tail.
Tour bus, private jet.
Thinking big ain’t failed you yet.
Just one thing you can’t forget.
Takes more than just wanting it.
Aim high, never rest.
Put your passion to the test.
Give your all, never less.
Famous means that you’re the best.

Really? That’s what they want to sell my kids on? Give your all, so that you’re famous? For FAME??? What about honor? Friendship? Respect? A sense of self-satisfaction? Lindsay Lohan is famous. So is Kim Kardashian. I would hate to think that the current achievements of these two are all they aspired to when they were 7 and 9 year old little girls and dreamed of being “famous”. I certainly hope that my kids dreams never sink to that level. That they don’t give their all to have the paparazzi following them, or to get a ride on a private jet. Neither of those things are guaranteed to bring happiness (see Princess Di or Patsy Cline). I do want them to dream big. Dream for a life filled with things guaranteed to bring them the joy that I have. Dream for a life filled with the love of a good family, good friends. Children that smile at you and scream at you, and light up your world brighter than any camera flash or stagelight ever could. Dream for a job that allows them to afford a home that is filled with warmth and love and good smells in the kitchen. Dream for the time to indulge in hobbies and pleasures that are fulfilling to their souls. Those dreams are the ones I want my children to have. That I want them to give their all for. I hope they do not want to be famous.

What’s in a Name?

My first question to myself when starting this new blog was actually, “what will I call it?”  Then I thought, well what am I going to write about? Then I thought, “I dunno”. I mean, I love to write, and although I always sometimes over schedule myself, I can 100% guarantee that I will not be writing my first novel anytime soon. And I don’t like the journal thing—feels too private and secretive. I don’t care if anyone actually reads my blog (well, I do—but not in an obsessive way-I promise!), but I do want to feel like I am talking to some-actual-factual-one.  So really, the blogging is just to give myself a place to voice my thoughts in a way that is most of the time, coherent. But what’s the THEME of it gonna be, I ask myself? I’m not frugal like The Frugal Girl-wise in the ways of living richly without spending exorbitant amounts of money. I’m not excellent at deal finding like The Thrifty Mama.  I don’t decorate well, even after daily visits to A Soft Place to Land and the Thrifty Décor Chick. We live in suburbia , not on a ranch, like Ree Drummond over at Pioneer Woman. We aren’t even known locally for being THAT family like Kristen is. Although I’m an okay picture taker, nothing I have NEEDS to be shared like Tara Whitney’s art does. And I’m not even raising future professional F-word sayers like the super funny Nikki at Life As We Know It. Well my middle J may cause ME to become a professional F-word sayer, but I doubt I use the word creatively enough to justify and sustain an entire blog.

So what’s my niche? I’ve thought some about it, how to keep my voice distinct—how to get myself in groove.  I know I’ll write a bit about my family, certainly a house of 6 people ranging in age from 2-87 must enable a story or two a week. Maybe some about my hobbies—photography, baking, reading, and a craft or two.   Perhaps even a post about my actual job. I do spend 40+ hours a week doing it. So as these thoughts are swirling and melding in my head, and I start thinking of all the hats I wear, the ones I’ve made for myself out of necessity and desire, and the ones that were made for me—blessings from God that I strive to be worthy of.  Some of higher quality than others. I change them more often than Jimmie Johnson does after winning a race. Mommy, wife, home manager, chef, baker, photographer, reader, writer, tutor, TAXI DRIVER, friend, daughter, cheerleader, and grocery shopper du jour. All hats I love to put on (except the taxi driver one—that one kind of sucks). So that’s it. I’m a lady with lots of hats. Or lids, if you will. So if you want to find me, here I am. Puttin’ on a Lid. Welcome.

Samantha

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